October 18, 2010

Processing my weekend in the mountains


My Sissy and I buried our baby brother yesterday.

Mom buried her baby boy.

Dad buried his only son.

The mountains of North Carolina have always held a special place in my heart, but now it will be even more special. Now, those mountains hold my little brother's shell.

David was the only one of the three of us not born in October and after the service yesterday, Mom mentioned that October was her month for welcoming babies, not letting them go. I told her David wanted his own special day in October – and special it was for him!

One of the pastors yesterday spoke of “the prison of bones” and David brings a deeper perspective to that. David’s body was never like it was supposed to be; he was born with multiple birth defects including lack of nerves, eyes that would not completely open and just recently we learned no arteries in his legs.

When he was younger, David didn’t let anything stop him…he started walking when he was three – flanked by Sissy and me! He participated in the 50 yd dash and shotput at Special Olympics. He was an honorary rodeo clown for the Mesquite Rodeo as a young teenager. He told everyone about the love and grace of God. He was a busy young man! And, a man who loved the Lord.

His joy was contagious! You couldn’t be around David without cracking a smile at some point!

On Saturday evening, my family had arrived in NC and we were very graciously welcomed by a retired couple that let us stay in their beautiful home. My Dear and I were standing out on their deck looking at the lights below and he began to comfort me. I was having a difficult time processing it at that point. I don’t know what all he said but I thought about the fact that if I asked God to raise David from the dead, he could! I know that sounds just odd but I was really missing him at that point and Jesus did raise Lazarus from the dead after 4 days!!!

Then I thought of how David would feel…he is now free from his very broken body! He is now in the presence of our Almighty God, praising and singing at the top of his lungs! And I realized, he would kill me if I wanted to have him back that badly!!!

Tim Surrett sang “Wish You Were Here” at the funeral….a very fitting song to know that it is how David is probably feeling about now! He is no longer a prisoner of that broken body…he is WHOLE! And, in the presence of Jesus –which is exactly where he wants to be!



I still miss him, and I know that I always will. However, I don’t ache like I did at first because I know he is so much better in Heaven! I am also reassured that one day, in the not too distant future, I will see him again….after I get over the ‘shock and awe’ of seeing my Lord for the first time!

I'm praising God from whom all blessings flow....and David was a HUGE blessing!

God's healing girl,

Pamela

I wrote this on the way home yesterday. Didn't want to change anything, though...I'm truly processing these emotions. Thank you for reading.

2 comments:

nanasandi said...

As the Big Sister of a very special brother, i can so relate to you. It truly does make Heaven a more interesting place with their presence. My brother Jimmy is still with us, but he has mulitple health problems. I hope to be able to make his time here as enjoyable as I possibly can by celebrating him. He is truly one person who loves and celebrates me, never just tolerates.

Pen to Paper; Spirit to Soul said...

Thank you...I will lift you and Jimmy up in prayer. Their lives are so precious! We always knew where we stood with David - and it was usually in a good place! Love that kid!!!