February 21, 2009

Is this jealousy???

I have shared with y'all before about my precious hubs being a bit unpopular through high school but there was one young girl that had a crush on him for years! She was three grades under him and her sister was in his class and something apparently caught her attention when she was about 7th grade. He did not reciprocate the feelings but she never stopped liking him, even after we had gotten engaged.

I just about watched her heart break 20 yrs ago when I showed off our wedding pics at church a couple of months after the wedding. I remember feeling so empowered that I had proof that he was fully mine!!! It was horrible looking back on it but as a 20 yr old bride, I wanted her to KNOW he was taken and totally off the market!

So, why am I telling you this 20 yrs after the fact, when I have shared how much our marriage has survived and thrived in spite of??? Because this young lady has found his Facebook profile and not only invited him as a friend but left him a private message as well. And since I am such a trusting wife (hahahahahaha! still working on that one!!!), I read the private message since he was still logged in on Facebook on his desktop computer.

It seems that she attends the church that we have recently moved to...do I hear "It's a Small World" being hummed in the background??? Even as big as our little city has grown over the years, we still end up in the same church???

So, I'm not sure exactly what I'm feeling but I really want to let her know that he is still mine and he is not going anywhere! I want her to know that I have stood by him through some really dark parts of life. I want her to know that we have two teenage daughters that we love very much. I want her to know that it is my privilege to be his wife, to walk beside him no matter how rough the path...or smooth for that matter.

Am I the only one that has ever had these feelings??? Please tell me I'm not alone! I don't think I feel jealous, there is nothing to be jealous of....he has not responded to either the friend invite or the pm....but there is something here causing my heart to race a bit and my blood pressure to rise. I have an increased desire to prove to him and those around us that I still love him tremendously and I'm not going anywhere!!!

Oh, my, is this immature or what??? There have been times during our marriage that he has caught the eye of other ladies but my reaction has never been this strong. Perhaps the fact of knowing this young lady has had feelings for him that pre-date mine. Maybe, I'm still jealous of the fact that she was willing to like him in spite of how others felt in school and it took a bit for me to see the real him and like him. I really do not know.

Does anyone have anything to share on this subject? I would really like to hear how others feel about this quandry I'm in. I think I may look her up in church tomorrow...in case you are wondering, her last name has changed but her relationship status is listed as single. And to think that I pressured dear hubs into signing up on Facebook and he finally did it within the last couple of months!

Okay, I am going to close now because I think I could just ramble on quite a while...and I don't want to do that to anyone! Sorry if I've already rambled too much!

Praise God from whom all blessings flow....especially my precious hubs!!!

God's girl, Pamela

Time for a Sean update -
He celebrated his birthday with his family this week! What a b-day celebration that must have been! They have moved him out of ICU and have started taking him off some of the medications. Last I heard, he had grown agitated and a bit confused by all the commotion going on but at least he is doing better and we know that God is still working this miracle in his life!

Thank you so much for your prayers and sweet thoughts. The family is appreciative as well, they know that many saints are praying for him and are thanful for that.

I pray your weekend is safe and awesome!!!

1 comment:

sherri said...

First of all, Thank you for wishing my hubby-Big Al a Happy birthday! I was hoping for 48 well wishes-he received over 60!!!!

This was a very good article. Yes, I think it's jealousy, but I also think it's normal and pretty wise.

WHat you do with this feeling is what's important.

I would feel the very same way.

I would just be sure to tell your husband your feelings. I would ask him NOT to repsond to her messages unless you are with him at the computer.

I would probably also plant my pictures ALL OVER his facebook! Especially RECENT ones where we are gazing LOVINGLY into each other's eyes! (that's just how I roll!)

You probably have NOTHING to worry about, but I think you are wise to have your antenna up.

Ask God to give you wisdom concerning this.